Editor's Note: Written by the married lone wolf male on The Bridal Helpline Squad!
Ahh - a question being asked by women past and present. Try some of our tips to see if you can get your fiance in the wedding planning spirit!
TIP #1: SHARE THE DAY
Let’s face it, 99.99999999% of grooms out there don’t really feel like the wedding day belongs to them. If you ask any one of them, they would likely say they feel like they are just there to be finely dressed eye candy waiting to take pictures with the woman of the hour. So how can you blame them when they don’t go all in with the wedding planning process?! One of the most simple things that can get them involved is make sure from Day One, you refer to the day as “ours”, “us”, and “we”. This will at the very least send the message that you expect him to have some say in decisions and want him to be involved. More importantly, this will also remind him the wedding is a celebration of your marriage and the growth of your relationship as well as reinforce his invaluable role, not only in your life, but to the wedding as well.
TIP #2: GIVE SPECIFIC TASKS
A lot of grooms to be really, really, want to be involved with the planning process, but honestly have no idea what they can do to contribute. They see you as a ball of energy that can’t stop moving whenever you hear the terms diamonds, orchids, lace, or fondant, and can’t figure out the best way to fit into your ever changing wedding stream of consciousness. If you want your groom to be involved, you have to ask him directly to do something specific. Make sure the task is something that you need done, and believe he can do without your assistance. Make sure you give him a deadline and MOST IMPORTANTLY, trust him to complete the task without asking for updates every hour on the hour. If you do this a few times, your groom will start to feel involved and likely start trying to provide his input… even when you don’t want it!
TIP #3: SHOW YOUR APPRECIATION
Men are simple creatures… Sometimes they just need a hot meal and a pat on the back. When he does something supportive of the wedding cause, be certain to express your sincere appreciation and gratitude with words of affirmation. You will be amazed at what saying “Thank You” and “You’re the Best” will do for his ego… And if you do this enough, he may even be a little more flexible when it comes to increasing the budget so you can get those specialty sweetheart chairs you’ve had your eyes on!
For more tips like this, SCHEDULE your Bridal Help Session today with a Certified Wedding Planner to get the help you need!